"SNOOTY COMEBACKS"

I think all knitters can totally relate to this. You are sitting quietly in the waiting room of the (insert place of destination here) knitting happily away, when someone comes by and either asks or says something really stupid like the following:
"That would drive me crazy! I don't have time for anything like that. I just don't have the patience to something like that. Why bother making one when you can go to Wal-Mart and buy one?"
the list goes on but that is just a few.

Well, here are some incredibly, wonderful comebacks taken from another knitter's blog that you will totally appreciate. (If you're a knitter anyway.) Here is the link and here are her witty and snooty comebacks!

http://www.home.earthlink.net/~jkoster/id3.html

Why can't you knit that for ME? Socks are cheaper at Wal-Mart! Only poor people knit! It's homemade--yuk!

Yes, we've all been there. Here's a list of catchy comebacks for those times when you want to leave someone in no doubt how you feel--about their stupid questions and remarks. Warning: these are NOT nice and polite!

“It’s my hobby. You know, like golf. Only it’s more productive and more relaxing, but probably NOT less expensive. Plus, I hang out with more interesting people and we dress better.” Of course, some of my favorite relatives golf, but they can’t be perfect—even if they are my relatives.

“Do you ask people why they golf, play the piano, sculpt or paint? Then don’t ask me the same question.”

“Yes, I’m sure you don’t have the time. You won’t MAKE the time (or choice, sacrifice, commitment, etc.).”

“You have to be able to FINISH what you start.”

“I’m sorry. Did you say something? I just felt a rush of hot air.”

“It’s fun to do it to annoy people who ask stupid questions about why people knit.”

“I am hoping Julia Roberts will spot me on location and put me in her next movie.”

“I’m auditioning for Desperate Housewives next week and I need to practice.”

"The Queen of England knits. It must not be THAT low class."

“WalMart doesn’t carry cashmere sweaters and custom-fit seamless socks.”

“SOME of us are talented enough to work with our hands.”

“You DON”T? You CAN’T!” Then laugh at them.

“Why knit? That’s so FUNNY!”

“This is a first--I’ve only had IGNORANT people ask me that before.”

“I HAVE people to love and knit for.” Requires a sneer at the end.

“You don’t have time to relax? Sounds like you need to get a life!”

“Yes, I am sure watching TV is very time consuming for you.” (LOVE this one!)

“It’s part of my housework avoidance plan.” (my personal favorite)

“Maybe YOU want to look like everyone else!”
“My knitting isn’t made in China by prisoners or Malaysia by child labor. How about your clothes?”

“It occupies my hands so I don’t throttle rude people.” Be sure to look straight at the questioner.

“How is knitting a bigger waste of my time than explaining it to people like you?”

“When I have my mid-life crisis, I can switch to leathers and a Harley, and it will be less expensive. My husband will be SO pleased!” (ok, this one made me laugh and snort!)

"My parole officer said it would help steady my nerves." Thanks for this one go to Gail, who saw it on KnitU.
"It would drive you crazy? Good thing I already AM crazy!" Try to look like you might also be willing to demonstrate. Or add, "At least, that's what the doctors think." This was inspried by Donna in SC from the Sock Knitters list.

Thanks to Denise for these. Please check out her BLOG she has great stuff there.

I usually am very nice and say something like, "It's cheaper then PROZAC." or "I have to keep my hands busy or I'll go crazy."

You know, I guess people can read, but who wants to sit in the doctor's office, dentist, orthodontist, church, sporting event with your nose in a book. I guess you would have to be introverted.

Not me, I like to be sociable and when I am around people, like at church or home school events, I don't want to be rude. Besides, most books people read are for entertainment, not quantum physics, you know?

When I knit, I am actually making something functional, beautiful and practical. I can also TALK while I knit. OMGosh! My lady friends and I have had so much fun at church, laughing and knitting and talking. Can you do that with your nose stuck in a book? I don't think so. Besides, most of the time, I see people trying to read a 2 year old Parents magazine at the Dr.'s and you KNOW they are well past the toddler years with their kids. LOL

I guess what irks me, are the people who try and put you down for knitting. I am not the challenged one here, I mean, it takes some brain matter to knit. But most times people blow you and your knitting off like some sort of repugnant leper. How dare I sit there, blissfully knitting away while they try and read a 3 year old magazine? Who do I think I am?

OK, so I am spending my husband's hard earned money on yarn. He would much rather me do that, then spend it on big, gaudy jewelry at one of those cheesy parties. At least, when I come home with yarn he doesn't ROLL his eyes like he would if I brought home another pair of shoes that I will only wear once because they were "too cute and on sale". I never hear him say, "Sweetheart, don't you have enough yarn?" Or "How much did that cost?" (He knows he's going to get socks, or mittens or something good from it!)

I would encourage all non knitting persons to look at knitting as an art. It is an art. Did you know, that during the 13th and 14th century, knitting was done by MEN? They would be apprenticed for 7 years, intern under a master knitter for another 4-7 years, then after submitting a detailed planned and final garment to the masters of the Guild, were they then made masters of the art. There are pictures of men standing casually while knitting. The yarn held in something resembling a tool belt. Amazing huh?

You should envy that blissful knitter sitting on the bus or at the drs. office, not try to mock them publicly. I will also warn you, there is a bolder and smarter generation of knitters out there, who are likely not to tolerate rude comments and will likely make YOU feel like the repugnant leper.

My advice? Buy some knitting needles, yarn and get someone to teach you how to knit. You'll be addicted in no time, that, or give the knitter some money to buy some more yarn! LOL

Gotta go, I here a pair of socks calling to me!
katcha

Nacho break

What a day...aren't all my days like this? I had to get hubby and our little house guest off early this morning. (My girls had a friend spend the night.) But, no sooner had they gotten out the door, I went back to bed. I knew what the day was going to be like and all I wanted to do was HIDE.

I have this little part time job I work, for a neighborhood association. I hate it. But, it pays for the kids school books. Anyway, the Pres. calls me up wanting to have a meeting...whoa, dude! Didn't we just have a meeting, like 2 weeks ago? He is wanting all of this stuff from me. Copies of bank statements, lot owners lists, and all of the regular financial reports, etc. I've gotten it all done, but sheesh. Right now is crunch time for me. I have over $3,000 in lot dues to record and deposit. There are address corrections to make, paperwork to take to the accountant to look over. There is the annual meeting to prepare as well. This is the busiest time of year for me PLUS the pressure of having to be a bill collector. I am the secretary/ treasurer, but they expect me to make phone calls, hunt down delinquent people and be a collection agency. I am not liking that. In fact, I told them last meeting I was not going to mess with who is behind, who needs liens placed on their property, etc. until after the annual meeting in May. Then, THEY can be the ones to play Law & Order. ok enough venting. I got that behind me, except the stapling.

I am going to take a bath, get chready for the meeting and sit and knit on my socks for a while. I need some major stress relief...and my back is killing me. I just ate some nachos, we'll call that dinner for tonight.

Well, I need to get off of here. BFN
katcha

Momma Has A New Look

Well, my Blog page anyway. It's the artist in me.
I love change and my blog just wasn't happening. The colors (although, I love earth tones...) were too bland. So, I thought, it's spring and I do have this thing about lime green...lime popsicles, lime kool-aid, lime jello, key lime pie, marguerita's, oops...ok, haven't had one of those in...hmmmm...years. But I love that green, so, BEHOLD! I give you, A LIME GREEN Blog. HAH!

I also changed the "theme" and "subject matter". I figured since my main focus is on my knitting and hopefully, my other fiber art, that the title needed to be changed. Also, my compulsive spending on yarn tells the story, right?

Which reminds me... I found really great novelty yarns at WALLY WORLD (of all places....evil nemesis) for 50 cents and $1.00. BEAUTIFUL stuff too. I snatched some up, but oh, had I more money to spend, I could have easily walked away with tons more. I mean for about $50 I bet I could have bought pretty near all of what they had. *sigh* Some of us just have to live and die by the budget, you know?

So, I hope ya'll enjoy the changes and will hang on with me. I promise it will be fun and I will still be posting about my personal goings ons. LOL! Besides, I should have some very cool news soon to share, but I don't want to jinx it.

I have got a lot to do, I'm going to the library to meet a friend of mine who lives up the road "a piece". She has 2 boxes of quilt scraps to give me! I am actually going to turn around and give it to a friend of mine who is an avid quilter, but also a SAHM strapped to a budget. (Maybe, I'll get a quilt?) LOL Just funnin', I really want my friend to have these, because I know how much she'll enjoy it.

And for inquiring minds...LOL...ok, so you didn't ask...my spearmint is making a come back already this spring. I picked a bit yesterday to make my tea with. WOOO HOOOO! I'm a happy girl.

BFN~
katcha

The Darkside of the Yarn

Not long ago, ok maybe before Christmas; in fact, right about the time Hurricane Katrina hit. MAN?! Have I had this stuff for that long?!
Anyway, I bought a whole mess of...yes, I hate to admit it...ACRYLIC YARN! (insert PSYCHO music here)
The cheap stuff, the big 1 pounders you get at Wally World, the gaudy neon orange, neon green, watermelon pink, aqua blue and canary yellow acrylic yarn! I mean, it was on sale for $2.97 a skien, what could I do but buy it? I could have resisted. I could have fought the urge and saved up for some more exspensive yarn from my favorite yarn "dig". I could have handspun my own wool and dyed it whatever color possessed me, but nooooo, I gave in, I was weak, I bought the yarn.

I have been struggling with what to do with these wayward, black sheep, kin of the yarn world, ever since. Finally, I figured it out.

Last weekend while in my favorite yarn dig http://www.yarnstudio.com/ , I bought some long, size 6 (US) birch needles to knit smaller weights of yarn with. When I had used bigger needles with the cheap acrylic yarn it was loose and looked, well, cheap. I decided to see how the size 6 needles would do. PERFECTION! I nice tight knit stitch, with just enough stretch and still look good. Now, to deal with the funky colors. (BTW, I like funky colors so the colors weren't a total issue with me.)
I was taking the yarn ends and twisting them together to see how they would look. (Something I learned in college as a Fibers Major.) I just happened to put that bright neon green and watermelon pink yarns together and twist, when my youngest daughter looked over my shoulder and gasped, "OH COOL! It looks like watermelon candy!" VOILA! Inspiration! Out of the mouthes of babes! I picked up the size 6's and started knitting a "beanie" style cap for my inspired daughter. I finished in 2 days. (gotta do housework and work sometime you know?) I put a spray of braids coming out the center instead of pom-poms (gag) and she is tickled. So am I! Thank goodness she has lots of shirts, sweaters and clothes in these colors.
I am starting on the second one now. This time, a bit bigger one for my oldest daughter. She watched me twist the neon green and neon orange yarns together and said, "I like that. It looks like melon colors. Make me a hat like sister's." so here I go. I would take pictures, but the digital camera's battery is fried. I'll buy a new one Friday.
I guess it just goes to show you...or me in this case...that you can take something that other "purest" knitters, yarn lovers and fiber artists would scoff at and make it into something pretty darn cute. At least I didn't try to make a toilet seat cover from it. Be glad, be very glad!

katcha

Time Flies...

When you are NOT having fun! *sigh*

I couldn't even begin to tell you what I have been doing, it's all a great blurrrrrr. There was my birthday (I am now officially the same age as Jack Benny and will stay there) and my son, my oldest, is 14! OMGosh, where did the time go???

Anyway, school, work, rehab house projects, birthdays, piano lessons, church...it just has all been whizzing by with a ferocity.

My scarf is hanging in the Fibers Show exhibit in Senatobia. We went to the opening of that. A lot of beauitiful pieces. This year, the Show Organizer, Sharon, will be coming up with a new theme for next years show. She said she would let us know in May, so we could ahve more time to work. I really like that idea, that would give me the summer to work on a project.

I currently have 2 different pairs of socks going right now. I am almost ready to work the heel on my hubby's socks and have just gotten the toe part done on my daughter's. I am really lovin' the "turkish cast on" technique. It is much easier and makes for an incredible no see 'em seam. Here is a link to the tutorial, I prefer. OK, I guess not...someone deleted my "SOCKS" folder from my favorites....ask me if I am pleased about that!? Ok, googled it and found it right off the bat! So ta-da! Here it is!
http://fluffyknitterdeb.blogspot.com/2005/10/knitting-made-easier-turkish-cast-on.html

The color my daughter has for her socks are soooo super fantabulous! I am so envious, I may have to find what other colors Regia has. But I have posted a pic of her yarn anyway. I thought it was purtyful and eyecatching on the blog page. LOL

Right now I am babysitting my printer, while it cranks out the new invoices for the neighborhood association. Lot dues are due in April, so, here I sit stuffing envelopes. Yuck. So far, so good though. Next, will be fishing cards to print and send as the dues start coming in.

I have not been able to do much more than that...I still need to help 2 more families with some handspinning...so after the invoices are done and sent, I will be carding more wool into battings...I am hoping that I will not have to wash any more wool. That takes forever.

We are all generally, well and healthy...ok well, my youngest son has a 99.9 temp and is sacked out on the couch, bur we are all generally well. I have lost some of my weight, but it's slow going. I absolutely LOVED the Soy Slim Fast that came out 3 years ago, but they stopped making it and I have not been able to find a good substitute since. I have tried dozens of brands of soy stuff out there and they are all "gaggy" but Slim Fast had it going on. *sigh* I keep hoping they will bring it back. Also, I could buy the big cans of it (powder that is) at Sam's Club for $10.00. They don't carry it anymore and I don't have a Sam's card anymore. I got put out with them about 3 months ago and said, "By God they won't get anymore of my business!" LOL

Great! The invoices are done printing so now I have to stuff some envelopes, (woo hoo). I hope eveyone is doing well and keep on keepin' on.
katcha