Sleeping In

I LOVE Saturdays. The one day of the week I can sleep late and not feel guilty. I make sure that I turn the alarm off the night before. My husband use to call it "burning daylight" when we were younger, but now I am out of the bed before he is. He usually wakes up just as the coffee finishes brewing.

The only thing I have noticed though is that I have strange dreams in those extra morning hours of sleep. Dreams that seem so real and that I can vividly recall for the rest of the day. I often wonder if it is because I normally wake up somewhere between 5:00 and 6:00. Maybe my brain is ready to wake up and begin the day but my body is not. They are always busy and almost stressful dreams but not necessarily nightmares. They usually involve people and problems that we are dealing with. Usually with a bizarre twist or two. This morning was no exception.

This time I dreamed that my alcoholic neighbor kept trying to come over and say goodbye to us before he went fishing with some goofy looking guy. I was really mad at hubby because he finally invited him in my house. We were having company over at the time. Mark Martin was there talking to some of the ladies from the Senior Sunday School class and drinking coffee. And all the while, the drunk is pacing around cussing and shaking hands with everyone. I didn't know who I wanted to shoot more, my husband or the drunk? But have you noticed how your home is not really your home? Or that the people seem totally oblivious to what's going on around them? Am I the only that thinks the whole situation is bizarre and abnormal? Am I the only one that dreams in color? (I have heard that people do not dream in color, but only black and white.}

I find my daydreams are much more fascinating. I am in control of what happens, I can reverse, rewind and change at will. Usually I am in a different place or a different home. I do not like my house, we bought it from my inlaws and I have never really felt like I was at home. So my home is always somewhere similiar to New Mexico or out west and depending on my mood an old Victorian home in the middle of a small town. The warm colors of the prarie, mesas and sunlight surrounding me with warmth & comfort. I have horses of all colors, my favorites being buckskins & paints. My house is a beautiful western style home, sometimes a log home other times adobe style. It is beautifully & tastefully decorated, large, inviting, room for everyone and everything.

*sigh* In a perfect world huh? I really wrestle with that as a christian. I should be content with where I am and what I have but at the same time I see lots of other christians who are very successful and have aspired to more. I want to be able to give more time, money and self to the cause of Christ. But when all your time and money goes to just surviving, keeping everyone clothed and fed. Well, it makes things tight. I don't want to have financial freedom after the kids all leave home. I want it before they leave home. To give them a bit more, more time, not stuff. I want to be able to put them thru college for heaven's sake! When you have to devote your time to working, there is precious little left over for them. I want to be able to travel more with them too. I am a homebody, but I like to see more than my own backyard. I think that is why New Mexico was so important to me. It was an oppurtunity to show the kids more of the world.

The best thing I can do is pray. Prayer is a great way to talk to God. You don't need anyone to intercede (except Jesus) for you, just talk to Him. You want to talk to Him like a firend, he knows your heart anyway. I find so much comfort in that and assurances. God has already shown me that he wants me to have a good life. Not The Good Life. LOL

I need to go for now...I will probably write more later. ~katcha